Why I Cosplay Girl Characters But Identify As Male - Dreaming Asa Singapore, cosplayer crossdresser otokonoko trap makeup culture subculture

Why I Cosplay Girl Characters But Identify As Male

At age 20, when reading a Japanese fashion magazine, Dreaming Asa saw a feature about ‘traps’—a boy dressing up like a girl and looking exactly like one, ‘trapping’ one into thinking it’s a female. One year later, he tried it himself and a couple of years after that, began doing it more actively. We reached out to him for a peek at the man behind all that women’s clothing.

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At age 20, when reading a Japanese fashion magazine, Dreaming Asa saw a feature about ‘traps’—a boy dressing up like a girl and looking exactly like one, ‘trapping’ one into thinking it’s a female. One year later, he tried it himself and a couple of years after that, began doing it more actively. We reached out to him for a peek at the man behind all that women’s clothing.

“To look good as a woman, it does not just end with having good makeup. Body language, tidiness and fashion play a huge part as well.”

Q: Hi Asa! Thank you for coming on board to share your thoughts with us today! First off, can you introduce yourself? Who are you, where are you from and how did you end up with 8,000 fans on your Facebook page?

A: Nice to meet you too, I am Dreaming Asa from Singapore. My hobbies include cosplaying, gaming and hanging out with friends. I did not expect my Facebook cosplay page to be popular at first but it started to attract more and more people after they found out I’m actually male.

I understand, from your Facebook page, you consider yourself male but cosplay female anime characters and often go out dressed in female get-up too? Can you reveal more about why it is you do that and where you see yourself in terms of gender and sexuality?

I get attracted to female characters from games and animes more often and I felt that I didn’t want to be bound by gender to cosplay who I like. I also dress in female get-up once a while and try to learn more about different kinds of makeup styles while practicing as much as I can. I still see myself as a male though.



When did you first dress up as a female and how did you decide to do so? What did it feel like doing so for the first time and did you go anywhere in that outfit that day?

It was almost 6 years ago, I feared that my parents would be against it so I told my sister in secret about it. I had no idea where to start and she introduced me to friends from the cosplay community who taught me how to do female makeup. It felt really embarrassing because I was afraid it would not look good but they did a good job in teaching me. We did it in a cosplay shop at SCAPE but I didn’t have the courage to go anywhere so I just stayed there the whole day. (laughs)

The first time Dreaming Asa dressed up as a woman, he was 21-years-old. He was at Orchard Road when doing so.
The first time Dreaming Asa dressed up as a woman, he was 21-years-old. He was at Orchard Road when doing so.

When did you start wearing women’s clothes on a more regular basis? What, or who, gave you the confidence to keep doing it?

I started to wear [women’s clothes] more often about 3 years ago. After I was done with NS [compulsory National Service], I started working and bought more and more female clothes. My sister managed to persuade my parents that cross-dressing is quite common nowadays and even my mom started to support me. That really boosted my confidence a lot.

How did you learn how to do hair, nails and make-up? And do you have to do anything extra to look good as a woman?

Other than my cosplay friends, my mom and my sis also taught me the tips and tricks of makeup. I also look to famous cosplayers to learn their makeup techniques and find suitable hairstyles. To look good as a woman, it does not just end with having good makeup. Body language, tidiness and fashion play a huge part as well.

Who are you when you’re not Dreaming Asa? Can you tell us or is it a secret?

N/A (Pretty much nothing.)

Does your family know about Dreaming Asa? What about ‘otokonoko’ or ‘trap’ or cosplay culture? How much do they know about those? How did they react when they found out, or how would they react?

Yes, they do and they are not impressed at all. It was thanks to my sister that they know. She managed to explain this subculture to my parents.

How popular is ‘otokonoko’ or ‘trap’ culture in Singapore, you think? Are Singaporeans receptive to seeing otokonokos out on the streets, from your experience?

From what I know, a lot of people who are into or not into cosplay also gave negative views about this trap culture.

Dreaming Asa cosplaying in September 2017.
Dreaming Asa cosplaying in September 2017.

What is your day-to-day routine like? How often do you cross-dress or are you mostly dressed as a female these days?

I try to keep my skin hydrated because I have dry skin issues. I usually dress out once every 2 weeks if my skin is doing well.

What about weekends? What do you do then?

I will hang out with my friends or do makeup tests at home.

What advice do you have for men hoping to look like Dreaming Asa and go out on the streets as Dreaming Asa does?

Having perfect makeup will not be enough, they need to learn to be feminine as well. Fashion and hairstyle play an important part too.

Can you map out a suggested action plan for people who want to do the above to follow?

Read up more fashion magazines or check out the internet for fashions that suit your taste.

What key things/people/situations enable you to be Dreaming Asa, in your opinion?

My family who’ve supported and guided me. If not, I would have stayed as a closet cross-dresser.

Dreaming Asa in casual wear in June 2018.
Dreaming Asa in casual wear in June 2018.

How did becoming Dreaming Asa change you as a person? Or did it not change you? Why?

It definitely did. I made a lot of new friends and even had supporters from overseas, something I never would have expected to have.

If you could go back and replay your entire life all over again, what would you do differently?

There is nothing I regret because what happened in the past makes me who I am today.

What were you like as a child? What about as a teenager and young adult? How did you change at every decade? Or did you not change?

I used to be a shut-in gamer. Slowly, after I started dressing up, I learned so many different things and became more open to new things.

Dreaming Asa’s makeup collection.
Dreaming Asa’s makeup collection.

Which 3 objects/people in your life can you presently not live without and why?

N/A (There is too much for me to name.)

Of all the objects you bought/received for the purpose of cross-dressing, which was most useful? Why?

Contact lens makes a huge difference for me; it’s one thing I cannot do without. It creates attention to the eyes and eye contact makes the most impact during any conversation.

Which person do you wish LUCK-IT would interview for you to learn from? Why?

Elizabeth Seah. She is the owner of Haru House, who brought Japanese culture to Singapore.

[LUCK-IT Update: We have interviewed Elizabeth! Read her interview here.]

What’s the worst advice you’ve been given, or have heard people giving? And what’s the best?

N/A (Even the worst advice could have been the best. It depends on differing situations and how you perceive it.)

Dreaming Asa when not dressed up as a woman. Taken in January 2016.
Dreaming Asa when not dressed up as a woman. Taken in January 2016.

Dreaming Asa is presently a transport operator and single, and is convinced most people will not be able to recognise him when he’s out in public. He is busy making props for his next cosplan but will happily answer any questions you may have for him if you ask him through his Facebook page. You may also share your own experience with cross-dressing in the comment box below.

Photographs courtesy and copyright of Dreaming Asa. Interviewer: Sy
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26 Comments on “Why I Cosplay Girl Characters But Identify As Male”

  1. I’ve really always disliked the term “trap” in anime/otaku culture. I honestly planned to make a post on this in the future. You do you by the way! You look awesome here!

  2. Hi Cailin! This is Asa here, thank you for taking your time to read! I’m just curious, so instead of the term “trap”, may i know how would you identify crossdresser?

  3. I have never heard the term “trap” but I am very impressed with your crossdressing lifestyle, and also pleased that your family has been so supportive. You look lovely as a girl or a boy! 🙂

  4. @SpookyMrsGreen Thank you very much for the support too! 😊

  5. Love learning about people. This is intriguing, interesting and out of my element. Thanks for sharing and I appreciate who you are. Respect.

  6. Hi, this is quite a personal question as i am also interested in openly cross dressing in casual wear.However, when you’re communicating with others whilst cross dressing, do you change your voice by altering the pitch of how you sound, or do you not talk at all, and just use simple gestures? Also regarding the usage of restrooms, do you use the female or male restroom?

  7. @Rae Hi, usually I would prefer not to speak but if I need to, i use my normal voice. I use handicapped toilet to avoid weird stares in toilets.

  8. Trap? I’m aware of the term but I don’t think it’s proper to call anyone that. I think the word “cosplayer” is the most fitting one, because that’s just what it is. You can do cosplay as anybody or anything of different culture, of different gender, or even of different species. Because that’s just what cosplaying is about.

  9. My two cents on the trap thing is probably because it has a negative connotation coming along with it, implying that you were tricked (in a bad way).
    I’d just call it crossdressing, or liking feminine fashion/masculine fashion (depending on the person) 🙂

    Also, not just for cosplayers, but for everyone, i think you can be a great inspiration in general – learning to be confident in who you are.

    Truly well done cosplays and best of wishes!

  10. “Having perfect makeup will not be enough, they need to learn to be feminine as well. Fashion and hairstyle play an important part too.”

    How does a male learn to be feminine? Can you tell us which female mannerisms you adopt when you are Dreaming Asa?

  11. @edwinlives4ever
    The term ‘Cosplayer’ are more suited for people who dress up as characters from movies, games or manga. The term ‘trap’ is actually a slang from crossdress, where guys dress up to look like girls casually. 😗

    @Cirasnu
    Thank you for the support!🙂

    @ST
    There are feminine guide online which teach you how to behave like female. For me, I would lower my voice when I speak, sit with legs closed and eat slower instead of chomping down the food. 😅

  12. Super interesting! Totally not my realm of expertise at all though I used to have a bunch of friends who did cosplay! Great job!

  13. @Kelly – Thank you for the support!

    @Scott – Thank you!

    @Kamakshi – Thank you!

    @gwengrat – It is indeed an interesting experience for me too.

  14. Hi I’m from Malaysia,most important thing do what ever you don’t care who ever give you negative comments is you are you yourself no one can control what you thinking.it is believe that we everyone one of us don’t care female or male we all have our masculine and feminine side.im hoping to cross dress as Ahri from lol she is one of my most favorite character

  15. Hi Dreaming Asa,
    I too, love dressing in cute feminine outfits but identify as male.
    Thank you, you inspire me to be more confident! Also I’ve never seen you out of cosplay! You look awesome in both forms! Absolutely slay!

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